I'll bet she douches with gravy.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
