Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Drunk is a universal language darling
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
