Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
