Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
