I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Randomize
