Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
