In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
