who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
