so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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