Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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