I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
