Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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