There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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