bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
