i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
