Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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