Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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