Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
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