i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
