Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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