i used baking grease as lip gloss
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
