So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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