My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Quick, to the slutcave!
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
The air taste purple.
Randomize
