He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
