Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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