Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
