Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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