Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
