member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Randomize
