i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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