No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
