dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
