I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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