Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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