He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Randomize
