quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
