it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize