why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
