i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I just want to make out with him forever
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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