I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
