I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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