I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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