That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
