Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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