Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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