Are we in a gay sports bar?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
