You're a womanizer and a bitch.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
