..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
