we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize