I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
